Dear Parents,
Today is International Children’s Day, a day when special attention is given to the position of children in society and when children’s rights are discussed. Social organizations work on this topic daily, striving to bring about changes in society that will ensure a better understanding of children and what a child truly is. You, as parents, also have an influence and a significant role in the fight for this important issue. I would like to reflect on what you as parents can do and apply in raising your child.
Child Development
Work on your child’s development. Your child has the right to learn and grow. Do not shift the responsibility for learning solely onto educational institutions. The child wants to learn and discover with you as well. The desire to learn does not end when kindergarten or school hours are over. Don’t forget about upbringing. Upbringing and education cannot exist without each other. Good grades at school are commendable, but so is sharing toys, helping a friend with homework, or expressing when something bothers us.
Listen to your child. Your child has the right to be heard, to be listened to, and for their opinion to be taken into account. Speak to your child as they are, just adapt the way you communicate according to their age. Talk with your child and set aside time for both of you.
Reflect on how you solve problems with your child and how you correct unacceptable behavior. Your child has the right not to suffer any form of violence. Violence is the parent’s way of solving problems. Don’t let it become the child’s way too. You may solve the problem at that moment but not in the long run. Talk to your child, listen, try to understand. Your child doesn’t function like you. If the child is upset, hug them. If they don’t want to go to sleep, pretend you are bears going into hibernation. If the child refuses to put on shoes, say “Our feet will get mad if they get cold.” There are ways—what matters is how you approach solving the problem.
Nutrition is important
Pay attention to what your child eats. Your child has the right to healthy nutrition. You, as adults, need to overcome with your child the attitude: “I don’t want that,” “I want chocolate,” “I don’t care, I don’t have to be healthy.” Why would a child eat beets when they know they will get a cookie if they refuse beets several times? Don’t prepare five meals so the child can pick what they want at that moment. Don’t think, “It’s better they eat this than nothing.” Decide what kind of nutrition you want for your child and be consistent. Your child needs your consistency. Explain and repeat. Every change requires consistency and time.
Protect the environment. Your child has the right to live in a healthy environment. Teach your child by example how to feel about nature. Don’t throw trash outside the bin while scolding your child for doing the same.
Understanding the child
Talk about diversity and uniqueness. Your child has the right to understand themselves and others. Reject any form of discrimination first within yourself and then with your child. Socio-economic status, language, need for additional support, religion, and similar are differences among people that children should accept, not condemn or respond negatively to. Teach your child to help, not hate. “That’s not for boys,” “Oh no, you’re a girl,” “Take pink, blue is for boys,” “A boy crying?” — let children’s choices and behaviors be a matter of their personality and interests, not gender.
International Children’s Day reminds us what we should talk about every other day of the year. Let’s start today, with ourselves!
Ana Jovanović, Pedagogue Trešnjober Preschool